He’s finally gone.
I have my life back.
Here one weekend, there the next.
The packing, the flying…
The constant goodbyes.
Do you know how hard it is to date long distance?
Not that I’m complaining. Ok, I am totally complaining. I’m bitching. As usual…I am yapping, and bitching…and complaining about the best thing that has ever happened to me. I have my nerve. My god to meet. I have met this amazing guy, and I here I am…crabbing about our situation. Shit. What is wrong with me? I’ll tell you what’s wrong with me. I am sad. That’s right, you heard me, I am sad. He just left an hour ago, and my heart hurts. Sappy, I know. I mean we just spent an entire weekend together, like every fucking second. No space. No alone time. I couldn’t even take a crap by myself. But I loved it. Every single second of it. And now, he’s gone. And I’m back to my solo life, per usual. Which really isn’t that bad. I kinda dig it. Its good having my own time, to do my own thing. I guess. I like me. And my thing.
But when you finally find the person you want to spend your alone time with, shouldn’t you just be able to be with them?
Why can’t it be our life, ya know…together? Like, in the same city! Or the same STATE for the love of all things holy. I would take that. Just the same State. “Geographically Undesirable” sucks the big one. And today, when it started to sleet…I was hoping, his flight would be cancelled. I pretended I wanted him be able to leave. Ya know, “Oh honey! I hope your flight gets out. I know you have to be at the office tomorrow!” But on the inside, I was dying. I wanted the Charlotte Winter Storm of 2015 to keep him here for all eternity! Form of an Ice City! ha. Get it? Mother Nature, do your thing! Ugh. I just want him here forever. Boo hoo. I know. Cry me a river. I’m obviously getting my period, ok? I wish I could have found the perfect guy in Charlotte. But I didn’t. I found him in D.C., and he is pretty dang perfect. He’s reading this, and laughing. And shaking his head. But he is, kinda close to perfection. Except for his location. Duh. And his love of the word, “moist”.
So, for now, or maybe forever…we will do this “long distance thing” until we just can’t do it anymore. We will plan little get-aways. We will make the most our time together. We won’t take it for granted, or fight. We will spend as much time as we can in bed, having amazing, mind-blowing sex. Yes. That’s it! Isn’t that just totally realistic? I mean, come on…isn’t that exactly how every long distance relationship is? It’s just like a fucking honeymoon every time you’re together?! OMG! NO! It’s not. Let’s just be real here, and tell it like it is! This thing is hard! We are not always as happy as pigs in shit. And we do fight. Mostly because I miss him. Shit. We miss each other horribly. I can’t talk to him every time I need him. We can’t kiss. We can’t touch. Or talk in person. We have to text, and hope what we are trying to say isn’t lost in translation. Our emotions lost in cyber-world. I can’t just swing over to his place for a quick hug when I’m having a shitty day. Fuck. It totally sucks. And when he’s here, my life stops for him. And when I’m in DC, his life stops for me. We are “guests” in each other’s lives. He’s meeting my friends, and still hasn’t even met Tammy! Or Sue. OMG! He hasn’t met Tammy!!! My best friend. And I haven’t met his best friends….or family. It’s just so hard. The logistics of everyday life.
But it’s so easy, too. So comfortable. So right. We just fit. He gets me, and knows me. And understands me. And still wants me. I love it. Ha. He still digs me. Wowza. And our time together is precious. We make a good team. We have a wicked connection. This can work, we just need to keep doing what we’re doing. Concentrating on the positive, and looking forward to the next time we will be together. I can do this! We can do it. So, whether he is in Charlotte, or D.C…or Timbuktu, I’m staying put. Well, you know what I mean. I’m staying put, with him. He is stuck with me!
I’m not going anywhere. And actually, I’m hoping I can convince this close-to-perfect-Jewish boy from DC, that he would do just fine here in Charlotte! I mean, wouldn’t that just be hilarious? Come on down, Mr. Big-ish…you’re the next contestant on The Truth Hurvitz! ha. ;)