I can’t say I’m upset.

I wish I had a little remorse.

Thank Goddess its over!

Can I get a whoop whoop?

For fucksake, Dick…drop that ball already will ya?

I have a NEW YEAR TO BEGIN! Omg. I am so happy this year is over. Actually, I have never been so happy in all my life. 2016 can kiss my fat ass! I am done. Done with people dying. Done with doors closing in my face. And done with unsupportive assholes. Buh-fucking-bye, you bitch-of-a-year. Yeesh. Should I tell you how I really feel? I hated this year. I did, and I can’t wait until Saturday night, when I can put it in the past, and move forward into the future. A future that is filled with all things happy, and exciting…and new.

2017 is my year.

Did you hear me 2017? I’m talking to you!!


You are my year, 2017.

And I’m going to make shit happen. I know, I said that this year. And last year, too. And probably the year before that one…But come on, I was a mess. I admit it! 2016 was a total mess, ok? I was listening and trusting all the wrong people. I had my head up my ass. And I was getting zero support from my family. I started dating a flippin psychopath, and it wasn’t until I ended up on an exam table with a cancer scare, that I realized I needed a full mind makeover. So, I headed to Campowerment in early November, and my life changed forever. I cleared my head, and let go of the guilt. I learned that I cannot please everyone, and I have to stop trying. Not everyone is going to like me, or the path I’ve chosen. And that is ok. I found my balls again, and my people. My people. People that think I rock. People that accept me for who I am. People that get me.

People who are my people. 

I am lucky. I mean, really. To learn who my actual people are, and how to find them. That Campowerment is a magical place, and yes…I know I keep talking about it. But how can I not? I feel like a new woman. Like I got a second chance at life. Stupid, I know. But if you’d just try it, drink the Kool-Aid…you’d feel the same way. But hey, I can’t help everyone. Just the chicks that want it. I wanted it, and needed it. What’s that cliché? You can lead a horse to water….But you can’t make him drink? Ya! That’s the one. Well, that is exactly how I feel about camp. Just go, bitches. Go.

And as far as my peeps go, 2016 was actually good for one thing. I finally found my MAN-person. Yup! I did. He kinda fell from the sky, in the form of a soccer-playin-intellectual-type. Yup! He’s brilliant and funny. And KIND. He’s real, and honest…and he gets me. Like really gets me. And I get him. He walked up my front steps, and I just knew it. He was it. I actually cried at Campowerment when I took the “Finding your People” workshop with Andrea Quinn, and realized that he in fact IS my people. I was right! For once, I picked a good one! I did. I texted him from Malibu. I said, “Omg, baby. You are my people!” He had no idea what the hell I was talking about, but he texted back,”Awesome!” He even wrote me a note for each day I was at camp…hid them in my suitcase. Little “empowering-like” messages. Ya, go ahead and say it, “Awwwww!” That’s right. This one is a keeper, and I intend on keeping him. You know, it’s funny…you always think you’ve found the right one, until you actually find the right one. And then, you realize…he is the in fact the RIGHTEST one. And all the others were just, well… wrong.

Mr. Happy is my people. 

And of course, we were planning on spending NYE together. But to stay with the theme of this blog, “2016 SUCKS BALLS”…he has to work. Ya, I know, it’s not that big of a deal. But I’m sad. And I have this superstition about NYE! I just think that you should be with the person you are dating…Or you’ll have bad luck in the upcoming year! I know, it’s dumb. But whatever. Now, I’m all freaking out and shit. And I can’t really be mad…but I’m mad! SHUT UP! I know, I’m being a brat. And I know it’s not his fault, the man has to work. But it’s NYE for fucksake! Good thing he’s so freaking awesome. And I know he’s bummed, too. But hear this…if we have a shitty 2017 it’s gonna be on him! Do you hear me, Mr. Happy? Sigh. I love you, S.

So farewell 2016, I bid you a big, fat adieu…here’s to the BEST 2017 ever. And remember we made a deal! This is totally going to be MY YEAR! ;)

xo j





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